FOR THE TERMINALLY ANXIOUS: a list

What practical advice to give my fellow independent thinkers trapped in this too-obvious simulation we’ve all been thrown into; the aim of which is to assume absolute control of the public’s mind and body at the expense of the spirit. Just being out in public and seeing the faceless zombies who think they are heroes for wearing their filthy masks is enough to trigger a psychotic break. Logic can be met with logic. Illogic, however, cannot.

Go with peace in your heart and dynamite in your hands.

Paper masks are the most economical way to muzzle a nation.

Whoever says Joe Biden is a puppet doesn’t know Mortimer Snerd.

Mao and Stalin are the McDonalds and Burger King of genocide respectively; in comparison to them, Hitler is Church’s Chicken.

A priest, a rabbi and an imam walk into a bar. Merry RamaHanaQuonzmas!

Communism’s just another word for “Nothing left to loot.”

Chairman Xi’s pronouns are Pi and Pooh.

What’s the difference between the FBI and the NKVD? … … … … … … … One letter.

Solzhenitsyn never laid an egg.

Thank you! I’ll be here all week. Try the veal. It really is terrific.